“The What.”
Part Two:
The “What you’re actually doing.”
We are Pattern-Seeking, Meaning-Making machines.
That’s what we are.
It’s also what we do.
Here’s an equation we’ll use to demonstrate this. (Think + Feel + Do) = (Be. Have) or, Behavior.
When you think a certain way, you feel a certain way, which causes you to act or do things a certain way.
When we run that “equation” enough times, it becomes habitual or automatic.
Eventually, that becomes “…that’s just how s/he is…”
This is how you’re getting exactly what you want, even when you don’t like it.
Here’s what you’re doing and how it works.
You’re inundated with an enormous amount of information every moment. In order to deal with that in real-time and survive, you’ve automated processes—everything from the beating of your heart and digestion to cell formation…
…to decision-making, attitude, and behavioral styles, what bothers you and what doesn’t, and how you act when you’re bothered… or not.
A key component to this is pattern recognition… and, you’re wired for it.
Neuroscience is a Rabbit hole if rabbits were the size of polar bears. Fascinating stuff…
There are two regions of the brain that do the “processing” of the information we encounter, while “being.” – a dual processing system… discussed quite well here and here… aaaaannnnnnd Rabbit hole, here – don’t get too lost.
Both from our external world (dealing with other people & circumstances) and our internal world (thinking, feelings, doing)… ALL the information we encounter.
- The prefrontal cortex (Conscious intent)
- The basal ganglia (Habitual – Unconscious Automatic)
The prefrontal cortex deals with our conscious intent decision-making, while the basal ganglia turns those “things” we have done repeatedly into automations.
Consciously and with intent. The prefrontal cortex – the things you know you’re doing…
This part of the brain is also responsible for you acting responsible and NOT losing your shit… until it gets turned off due to stress… and then, well, then you’re just a fucking animal, and all hell breaks loose (even if that occurs covertly, under the radar and is hardly noticeable by you or others…).
A minor inconvenience dealt with using an old automation? Not the end of the world.
…on the other hand, if you’re at your wits end and it’s the “last fucking straw,” the world gets to see you falling down.
Onward…
Unconscious and automatic. The Basal ganglia – how you turn conscious decisions and choices into automation through repetition.
Between using our mind consciously to make a decision and acting on it, our ability to automate that process, then using a combination of the other parts of our brain, such as the frontal lobe and the brain stem complex; we carry out many of those “tasks” (reactions) without even being aware of it…
And since these processes range from regulating your breathing and cell formation to how you see things (pattern recognition) and how you cope with them… having systems onboard to “get it right enough to survive” was necessary in order for you to make it to adulthood.
You can think of these as factory installed software, they allow the system to turn on and provide a somewhat stable environment for the operating system to be installed.
You encounter information (have an experience).
You have an internal reaction to that information.
You process that internal reaction and that information into specific categories you’ve constructed based on previous experience and then react.
The more we practice a thing, the better we get at it until it’s automatic. Aka unconscious competence… or, unconscious expertise.
Your heart beats without any conscious effort. Your lungs breathe seemingly on their own… your digestion happens without any conscious thought.
We use the same processing system in the brain to automate things like moving or flinching if we knock a mug off the cupboard shelf, pulling our hand back when we touch something hot and so on.
The same thing occurs when we repeat emotional reactions or, have the same kinds of thoughts over and over.
By the time you’re an adult, you have done that so many times that you have established your own personal way of being.
Much of that was instilled (installed) in you by those who raised you, and the types of people who influenced you as you were growing up… and “people like us do things like this” holds true. Call this your “preinstalled OS.”
Since then, you’ve added countless personalized programs that you use as behaviors, attitudes, beliefs and so on…
Like Sheldon knocking three times... he’s got his reasons for that weird ass behavior, and it’s one of his programs he knows about and understands why he does it.
We’re like that too, some of the weird shit we do, we’re fully aware of… that’s typically not the “programs” that are getting us what we don’t want… that’s just the odd shit that makes us cute and endearing, albeit sometimes annoying to those who care about us.
The examples could go on for days. Let’s leave it at this… all the weird shit you know you do… yeah, that’s not the half of it.
(Think + Feel + Do) = (Be. Have.)…
or the shorthand for it… how you’re “bein’haved.”
Catch it?
By the way… “in order” – I’ve said that a lot thus far…
The main reason is this; if you follow the instructions or the directions for something and do that “thing” in the right (read: Appropriate) way, provided the instructions/directions are accurate, you arrive at the desired outcome or destination.
That ought to be obvious, however, to really make the point…
When you make a bowl of cereal, you don’t pour the cereal on the counter, dump the milk in the kitchen plant, and then throw the spoon in the trash…
We all know that you get a bowl out of the cupboard, a spoon out of the drawer, the cereal out of the pantry, and the milk (or whatever the hell you use, I like prefer half n half…); you pour the cereal in the bowl, then add the milk, grab the spoon and head over to the table.
An interesting aside… some of those instructions or directions, you can follow in whatever order you want…
However, if you follow some of them in the wrong (read: Inappropriate) order, you’ll have a bowl full of milk with a few flakes of cereal on top and a bunch of cereal on the counter and probably the floor.
Makes sense, though, right?
The takeaway?
Following instructions is important, and doing them in the right order is critical. You are always following instructions… even those you’re not aware of, and, you do it fabulously.
The “rub?”
Even if you appear to be conscious, walking around talking to other people… wearing clothes, acting like you’re awake.
You like the rest of us spend somewhere between 80-95% of your waking hours using these recipes to deal with your experience. Acting out of unconscious automation…
We even have phrases for it, ie. “going through the motions.”
You’re automatically following perfectly constructed instructions that you have honed over the years, and you’re carrying out those instructions in a particular order…
Which results in what you’re getting.
The “issue” or “problem” is that many of these automation were designed to cope with the world when you were a child, or an adolescent… your values have changed, what you want has changed, your automations and programs haven’t been adjusted for that.
To complicate matters, you’re simply not aware of what those instructions are or how they work…
Or why you constructed them in the first place.
But you are doing it flawlessly… and getting what you’re getting, whether you like it or not.
You + Information = Automatic Reaction.
As it “ought” to be.
Rehearsed to perfection.
Many of the instructions you constructed and have perfected work excellently… or you wouldn’t be here, upright and breathing, with enough resources to be looking at a screen and the time and space to do so.
I’d also imagine you’ve got food in the cupboards and can turn the lights on when you please.
Some of your instructions aren’t as beneficial as they could be…
Others are actively working against you.
Regardless of the outcome your instructions result in, they work exactly the way they were designed to.
And they “output” a very specific result.
We’re always talking ourselves into and out of everything we want… most of the time we have no idea that we’re doing that, much less, how it works.
Up next: “The What” you’re looking for…
